In Fairness, I Was Warned

I have this customer that is a little, well, looney. When she phones and I greet her using her name before she has introduced herself, she is shocked I know that it's her and proceeds to question how on earth I could have known. So each time we go through this routine of me telling her that I recognize her voice and then she responds with, "I know I sound like a little girl, but I'm really sixty-three years old." I've heard that line seventeen times since I inherited her account.

She often sends us correspondence on used cards. Used cards. Again, used cards. I've never heard of anyone reusing a Christmas card as stationary. So, that aside, she often draws on the cards...with crayons. She usually draws stick-type flowers, and then she writes what type of flowers they are underneath.

Today, I was opening a letter from her. On the outside, it read "Purple Phlox & Handicap Unlimited Bill Inside." So, I surmised I would have a drawing of some purple phlox on the bill.

Needless to say, dried, dead, purple phlox just scattered all over my desk. So much for artwork.